Thursday, December 30, 2010


Let's make friends/ And not refer to rap monikers and astronomers/ And
be fun-loving/ I'll give you roses, about one dozen/ Everyone one at
this party is so dumb and aloof/ But you pry open closed minds like a
sunroof/ And you're interplanetary/ And they're hindered while you're
candid and carefree/ Your impression of that political figure was done
with cynical vigor/ And it was so fucking funny/ You're a conduit of
impromptu skits/ If your karma's bad/ You need to disrobe/ That
armor-clad xenophobe that resides in your innards/ Before you die and
wither/ Your inner playground's full of cobwebs/ But I'll help you reach
that obtainable godhead/ Through Tai Chi stretching/ And improvised
rapping/ So what if the posh are wed to the idea/ That we're bastardized
and crossbred?/ They can't hint the live acts' whim/ Or synthesize the
vaccine/ They await the star's hardened prick/ And his guitar pick made
of arsenic/ But my sardonic wit goes far beyond it/ Let's forget the
rock star ethos/ And go to the underground celebrity roast/ And make
some friends/ And forsake the trends/ We'll throw rocks at tanks/ Erase
the programs/ Leave the robots blank/ And curb spending habits/ Through
serendipity/ Let's make friends/ Is it all ages or 21 and over?/ Because
Miss Honey Bun is older than a pre-teen TV screen/ I suggest let's run
with the sun at our shoulders/ I have money in my gun holster/ And
several drink tickets/ But by the end of our interaction/ You'll
probably think I need to pay a shrink a visit/ Because tonight I'll
treat you like girl meat/ Dressed in a sesame seed bun/ Asking you and
your homegirl if you're interested in a threesome/ But I'm out of line/
Because you're an under-sexed lady cop/ But you rubbernecked when I came
in the spot/ I gave you enough respect or maybe not/ You're the cashier
at Wal-Mart kissing the traveling man/ I'll give you a papsmear a la
carte/ In our 15-passenger van at my show/ The ephemeral girlfriend with
extra baby fat/ Courted by the LA megalomaniac/ And you're much more
friendly than the rats I know/ I tried to foster a newfound love that a
kiss led to/ Oh how I misread you/ And I just tried to be the downest
homie/ But our friendship was short-lived you weren't supportive/ And
saw I had a speech impediment like Pork Pig/ But to say we can't be
friends is not so/ We can go to a hip-hop show and join arms/ In unison
at the soy farm